Hey Shorty

I’ve never really had a physical type that I’m attracted to.  I’ve gone out with fatties and hairy guys and anorexic looking ones and baldy’s and homos and even blondes.  Looks have never mattered much as long as there is a substantial amount of confidence, wit, intelligence & older-than-me-ness to make up for the spare tire or waxing needs.

But today I finally realized that I do have a type, but the thing is, this type is not a stereotypical type such as,

“Tall, dark and handsome” or

“Good manners, rich and Porsche” or

“Emotionally available and doesn’t live with mother”

Nope.  In reviewing my past crushes I’ve realized that many of them are short.  Like shorter than me if I’m in heels, but I do wear very tall shoes.

Many women are turned off by the vertically challenged, but I’ve notice the shorty’s generally have better personalities and look better than the giraffe’s because they probably have short mans complex, so have worked hard to maintain their appearances and senses’ of humor.  The point of all this is to say that if you know a short guy that is funny and has a job please hook it up.

However,

if you know a tall guy that has short man traits that would be better because it’s much easier to sniff the armpits of a tall guy.  Plus tall guys generally can’t fit into my pants and I’d never date a man who could wear my pants.   That’s a deal breaker.